None of them
G
Oh the sand keeps falling through the hourglass
D Em
And there's no way you're gonna slow it down
C G
You say we gotta treasure each moment
D B
Who knows how long we're gonna be around
C G
Yeah you keep on telling me life is short
B C
And it's hard to disagree with what you say
G D
But if time is so precious, why ya wasting mine
C
Cause I'm always reading, Always deleting
C D
Every useless piece of garbage that you send my way
G
Every stupid hoax
D
All those corny jokes
C D
Stop forwarding that crap to me
G D
Well I don't need tons of cringe inducing puns
C D
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Em Bm
No it isn't ok if you brighten my day
C D
With some cut and pasted hackneyed Hallmark poetry
G D
And I didn't request a personality test
C D
Stop forwarding - that crap to me
G - D - C - D
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...
D G
You're sending virus-laden bandwidth-hogging attachments
D Em
to every single person you know
C G
You're passing round a link to some dumb thing on YouTube
D B
That everybody else already saw three years ago
C G
And wacky badly Photoshopped billboards
B C
were never that amusing to me
G D
And I just can't believe you believe those urban legends
C
But I have high hopes someone will point you toward Snopes
C D
And debunk that crazy junk you're spewing constantly
G D
No I don't want a bowl of Chicken Soup for the Soul
C D
Stop forwarding that crap to me
G D
Send more top 10 lists and I'll slash my wrists
C D
Please stop forwarding that crap to me
Em Bm
Well I'm sorry I can't accept your paranoid rant
C D
And I don't want the Neiman Marcus cookie recipe
G D
Won't you kindly refrain, cause it's hurting my brain
C
Stop forwarding... that crap to me
Am D
Like glittery hearts and unicorns and pictures of somebody's cat
Am D
Now tell me in what alternate reality would I care about something like that?
Em
And by the way your quotes from George Carlin aren't really George Carlin
Bm
Mr. Rogers never fought the Viet Cong
C
And Bill Gates is never gonna give me something for nothing
A
And I highly doubt some dead girl is gonna kill me
A
If I don't pass your letter along...
A G
Well now I know you're wishing
D
I'll sign your petition
C D
But stop forwarding that crap to me
G
And I don't want to read your series
D
Of conspiracy theories
C D
Just stop forwarding that crap to me
Em
And your two million loser friends
Bm
All have my address now
C D
Cause you never figured out the way to BCC
G
Now I gotta insist
Em
Take me off of your list
C D G
Stop forwarding-- that crap to me
G G - G/F#
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Em Em - Em/D
Stop forwarding that crap to me
C D
Stop forwarding that crap to me
(repeats)
C - D - G
Ahhhhhhh....
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